We miss you so much. We still talk about you, we still wish you were here, especially now that your sister Nora is here with us. Her laugh and her way about her makes us wonder even more about what you would have been like if you'd been born healthy.
I can go back to that hospital and that day in a flash. I remember holding you, and just about every tear I've shed on that day and since.
I hold on tight to the dream I had of you that you are fine, in heaven, whole, and beautiful.
And even though this was my "first" Mother's Day for me in the eyes of many, I know I've had many more before that. I just finally got my earth girl this year to celebrate with.
And celebrate is what we have to do.
We wish things were different, but they're not. In the end we have to accept that and live life as fully as possible. Your sister Nora hears your name and will grow up knowing about you and that you touched our lives.
I know that while it might make you feel good to know we miss you, you would not want your Dad or me or anyone else to use your loss as a reason to stop living or not live life to its fullest. So that's what we'll do.
We love you Jacob. We always will.
You're in our hearts and minds forever, precious boy.