And Now For Something Totally Hilarious

I can't help this one...it's making fun of my own people, but I had to share:


Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southerner?

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.

Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and
charges at you.

You are carrying a Glock 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere
seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
...............................................

Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man
look poor? Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him that would
inspire him to attack?

Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids?

What does the law say about this situation? Why am I carrying a loaded gun
anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my
children?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed
day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

-------------------------
Republican's Answer:
BANG!

-------------------------
Redneck's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

Click..... (Sounds of reloading)

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG!

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or
Hollow Points?

Son: Why did that dumb SOB bring a knife to a gun fight?

Wife: Don't you dare take that thing to the taxidermist.